JOURNEY in HARMONY

I had the pleasure recently of participating in a tele-seminar with Dr. Alice Vlietstra a psychologist at Life Tree Solutions and anthropologist, Dr. Jane Granskog. Our topic was about creating environments of harmony and dealing with all the ’stuff’ we seem to accumulate in our life. We see articles about clutter all the time and how to deal with it. And in many cases it always seems to mysteriously and magically return to our lives.

We each shared our insights on how our belongings affect our thinking, behavior, stress level and our culture. This was fascinating to learn that this has not been a problem for all time in our western culture, AND, not all cultures emulate western behavior.

There’s fascinating insights for everyone who has clutter or has ever experienced stress caused by “too much stuff!”

http://www.lifetreesolutions.com/seminars/conference-calls

Share your comments below…..

Have you ever felt a bit out of sorts and wonder why? Perhaps you have been trying to make some changes in your life but nothing is working. Did you ever consider that your home may be influencing you? Are you aware of when you are at ease in a room and can work and play comfortably. Or perhaps just the opposite, that some rooms aren’t relaxing at all and you can hardly think in there?

Here’s a simple experiment to help you get in touch with the energy in your home and understand how it is affecting you:

• First, choose two rooms in your home … one that is messy or cluttered and one that is clean & attractive.
• Next, get calm and centered by closing your eyes and taking a few deep breaths.
• Then, when your head is clear and you feel relaxed, walk into the messy, perhaps cluttered room … maybe it is your garage … and sense how you feel. What thoughts come to mind, are your spirits lifted or do you feel down and stressed by what you see?
• Again, get calm and centered by closing your eyes and taking a few deep breaths.
• Then, walk into the attractive room that is free of clutter. Again, sense how your mind and body feel … are you tense or relaxed, happy or stressed and sad? What do you want to do in this room … sit & read, relax, create, draw, talk?

Can you feel the difference between the energy in these two spaces? How do they change your mood and thinking in a positive and/or negative way?

We are all affected by the energy in the spaces around us. The good news … we have the ability to control the energy in our environment. We can create the surroundings we need and desire to live, work & play in a balanced, positive, supportive home.

So if you’re feeling stumped and are curious to try new ways to feel, work and play better try these tips:

• Cluttered spaces usually make us irritable, stressed, depressed, sluggish and confused. So clear your clutter!
• Open spaces, with good lighting help us relax, feel comfortable, calm our nerves and help us think clearly helping us be creative and productive.

Check back for more tips soon…..

I had an enjoyable learning experience recently at a workshop called “Finding Your Voice – Speaking Your Truth”  facilitated by a talented coach Mary D’Amato in St. Louis, MO. It was fascinating working with other professional women digging deep into our psyches. Our goal was to identify an issue we would like to re-play from our past and script a new response that better honors our values and ourselves in the future. Think of it as re-writing the heroine’s future in a movie’s ending. Quite a positive and worthwhile experience! You can check out the program here…http://www.rxmgt.com/home/womans-retreats. I highly recommend it.

For me the workshop was a great example of life as an energy connection. Simply stated:

1. begin with a LIFE premise: an issue from our past we want to learn from and handle better in the future
2. add ENERGY: fresh outlook plus a variety of new ideas creating a new perspective
3. outcome: gain deeper understanding and CONNECTION to our core values, learn more options, and gain confidence to express our clear intentions

While this exercise was draining at times when I finished I felt exhilarated, buoyant, creative and energized. My soul seemed free from the ’stuff’ I carried around for months or longer with these issues.

We all, at times, find it difficult to be focused, speak our truth and live our truth too. Why is this important? If we can’t focus we can find it difficult to get even simple things done much less succeed at complex tasks…. like getting a degree from college or creating a business to name a few. When we don’t follow our intuition and identify what is important to us we often feel lost, unconnected, make bad choices, feel alone and unappreciated. Yuck!

The ability to see, understand and influence the energy in our life is fascinating and a valuable skill. It’s like viewing the world through new glasses… colors are brighter and things are sharper… life is good. Once you catch on to understanding energy…you’ll be changed and rewarded for life.

What’s energy, what does it do anyway, you ask? A short explanation is: energy is everywhere, of everything and in everything. Scientists recognize energy exists in many forms. Energy can at times be called the ’stuff’ in our life, such as:

• physical things (too many books, clothes) or not the right things (you really don’t like the painting or shoes)
• mental things (too many thoughts – the chatter you can’t shut off in your head) or multiple goals you want to achieve – all right now!
• emotional things (heartache over the one that got away or excitement over too many heartthrobs) or regrets
• the space (too much, too cramped), air (fresh or stale) and objects that surround us (attractive or not)

It’s no wonder we find it challenging to achieve the ‘quality’ of life we long for. So what to do?

I’m passionate about understanding energy and using this knowledge to enhance my life. So many wonderful changes have already happened to me…I’m never looking back. The workshop helped me clear my energy block around writing by helping me create a fresh outlook on the situation and adding new ideas from my group, resulting in my commitment (this is what I was lacking) to write a weekly blog. I’ve aptly named it: “LIFE – ENERGY – CONNECTION“. I will show you how to:

• create balance in your life (no more working all weekend) and why that’s important
• live with more energy and less stress each day (have some fun & smile!)
• make a stronger connection with yourself, the people, relationships and the things that are important in your life (the who and what you would take to that island paradise if you HAD to move today and live forever)
• live surrounded by and connected to what you love (not just a lot of ’stuff’)

Of course I’ve made it easy (no stress=good energy) to sign up for ‘LIFE – ENERGY – CONNECTION‘ weekly. Just click on the RSS Feed (orange box) near the top right of this page and choose your preferred delivery option.

Here’s to your LIFE ….. let’s fine-tune your ENERGY and strengthen your CONNECTIONS!

To your happiness, Samantha

When it comes to clutter there’s no where to hide. What does this mean? Well, you can put something out of sight, as in another room, or down in the basement, but ‘that stuff’ still lingers in the back of your mind even though you can’t literally see it. Sort of like that bad dream you can’t shake.

Clutter is things you don’t love, use or need that exist in three areas of your life:

• physical….the stuff you can literally see & feel
• mental…the background chatter that goes on in your head
• emotional…those lingering feelings of despair, loss, anger, resentment that remain in your heart long after the incident is passed

Listening to a ‘no texting while driving’ message today it occurred to me that we so overload our life with activities, requiring multitasking to get it all done, I wonder if we realize we are cluttering up our minds with more than we really can or should handle all at once. What effect is all this ‘busy-ness’ having on us?

All our ‘busy-ness’ is creating more mental clutter by the minute because we’re trying to keep it all straight! This is resulting in a growing in-ability to focus on anything for more than 10 seconds. This seems like the wrong road to take in life. Do you want your spouse, date, children, parents to spend just 10 seconds actually listening to you?

Wow, that thought makes me crazy! How about you?

Feng Shui is about finding balance in life, not the ‘all work & no play’ philosophy. So here’s a quick idea to get you started using some basic Feng Shui wisdom and make your life happier and more satisfying. Start today with this easy step to de-clutter your brain and become more mindful about who and what is important to you:

Force yourself, yes, I know it will be necessary to force yourself to sit quietly for 10 minutes without interruption, close your eyes and just breathe. I know it’s hard, I’ve been there… but oh, it’s so worth your time and sanity to do it.  Then, after you know how good it feels and how much you need it, force yourself to do it once a day. Aren’t you worth it? Don’t you deserve 10 minutes of  ‘free-me’ time?

That’s it! Start there, and don’t let me know how you’re doing… (not because I don’t want to know how you are doing) but because I don’t want to give you anything more to do….you’re busy enough already.

Then, when you feel like it, and your mind and life is less cluttered and more enjoyable, check back with me and find more easy ways to release the burden of clutter from your mind, space and life.  Have fun!

This is my second blog about good energy for your master bedroom. The first dealt with the importance of making your bed. Have you adopted the ‘make your bed’ habit? I heard from several readers who are quite surprised that they are enjoying the change in their bedroom atmosphere as well as how much better they feel starting their day. You can check it out here: http://journeyinharmonywithfengshui.com/lets-make-your-bed-1070.html

Two more important aspects of your master bedroom are the placement of the bed and your nightstands. In order to sleep comfortably and feel secure it is best to place your bed so that you can easily see the door of your bedroom when you are lying down. Feng Shui is always concerned with your well being and safety and this position allows you to easily and immediately see anyone entering your room. Naturally you will feel more secure if you can easily see the bedroom entrance when in a relaxed, resting state.

The second aspect of good bedroom chi is the nightstand placement. This can sound odd to you because you may feel this furniture is insignificant. Remember Feng Shui teaches us we are connected to everything in our surroundings. That means we are sending a message to to ourselves and others by how we arrange our surroundings. Many people buy matching nightstands and that’s all there is to know about that subject! Or often the salesperson suggested it’s a good idea, so OK, fine. Well, in Feng Shui the night tables beside the bed tell us about our partner relationship. If you want equality in your relationship, such as an equal say in decisions made, have two nightstands that are identical or equal in importance. If you want to have more say in what’s going on, get yourself a larger more significant nightstand. And watch what happens.

This furniture arrangement influences singles looking for a partner/marriage relationship too. Quite often when we are single we may only have one nightstand. Whether it’s a space issue or we think we’ll get to that when we find someone we often ignore how our bedroom looks until that “Mr/Ms Right” shows up. Then it’s OMG what do I do first!. Just think of it…where are you going to put your new partner if he/she arrives today?

So with this new partner re-design you are physically and symbolically accomplishing three things:

1. Arranging your bedroom for the style of relationship you are seeking, equal, balanced, part time etc.

2. You are physically making room for someone in your life.

3. You are subconsciously and consciously sending out the message “I’m ready, willing and able to start a new wonderful relationship.

Remember, if you seek balance and equality with your partner get two matching or equal night stands, if you want to be the stronger partner, making the decisions, and shouldering most of the responsibilities…be sure your nightstand is larger and more significant. Or you can reverse this arrangement…you see what I mean. One client was unsure of  a guy she was dating and when we discovered she didn’t want to get married again, we saw it was evident in her bedroom as she had only purchased one nightstand with her new bedroom furniture. Instinctively she knew what she was doing, she just wasn’t conscious of her choice.

Whatever your choice…be happy with it.

My next blog will complete the master bedroom series giving you whys and wherefores of other furniture in your bedroom…desk, TV, sewing machine as well as artwork and color choices.

Gals, (and guys of course) Feng Shui helps us care for ourselves and make our life easier and better. Feng Shui is focused on energy and tells us that our home is the most important place in our life. Caring for ourselves and our home takes on many forms, some not always obvious, with many often overlooked benefits. Most women care for others and often run out of time to care for themselves. Well gals, this blog is for you…the first in my new series sharing easy ways to help you make your home and life better…one small, easy step at a time.

Inviting, restful?

Does this make you feel relaxed?

Start with your bedroom, the most important place in your home in Feng Shui. First, answer these questions about your bedroom and … say them out loud…just for fun.
Do you like your bedroom?
Do you like your bed?
Do you sleep well?
Have you actually decorated your bedroom so you love it?
Is your bedroom your second office?
Is it your second/third TV room?

OK, now you know what you really think of your bedroom and how you use it. So, first things first…your bedroom is meant for two things…sleeping and intimacy! If your bedroom serves any other function…..you’re robbing yourself of true relaxation, warm intimate relations and rejuvenating your body. These are three things you need to fulfill your desires for a long life filled with happiness, good health and doing everything else on your bucket list.

How your bedroom looks, feels, and how you use and care for it is vitally important. Your bedroom reflects how you treat yourself, your partner and your intimate relations. I know you’re thinking I’m pushing it a bit, but stay with me. Are you saying: “but I don’t have a partner”…well, this will help clear your head and start to attract the right one. I’ll start with one easy change in your bedroom. And I’ll bet only 15% of my readers already do this.

This easy change is: make your bed every day!

Sound silly? Sound dumb? How can that help me? How does my life improve if I make my bed you ask? Well listen up! Your bed reflects the condition of your head. If it’s jumbled and unmade, so’s your head and subsequently your life. You are helping yourself in 3 ways when you make your bed: you show attention, care and respect for yourself. And what’s not good about that?

1. Attention: You pay attention to the most important piece of furniture in the most important room in your home – your bedroom where you spend 6-8 hours renewing your body & spirit daily. The bed that helps you relax your muscles and supports you as you sleep.

2. Respect: You respect yourself by spending a few quiet moments arranging your bed and at the same time organizing your thoughts to start your day in a positive, clear frame of mind.

3. Care: You show gratitude towards what you appreciate… and you prepare your room for the upcoming night’s restful sleep and in turn care for yourself. Would you rather walk into a bedroom with a neat bed or one that looks like it’s been slept in while you were at work? The messy bed feels cluttered and that’s too much energy for a relaxing night’s sleep. Besides it puts you in a down mood….”what this mess again?”

So please, start here… make your bed every day for just one week. You can stick with anything for a week. See how you feel. I predict you’ll benefit, feeling more relaxed, more in control, less stressed, think more clearly, and you will have a wonderful week. After all, if you are rested, relaxed and confident you will glow.

I’d love to know how you do….drop me a note. Stop back next week too as I explore another aspect of the master bedroom to help bring sweet dreams and delicious relationships.

How are you doing? … Can you FOCUS?

Have you noticed there are so many people talking about FOCUS? Actually people are talking about how they lack the ability to focus. More people are noticing that we no longer feel in control of our multitasking lives. Is that how you feel? Were you able to begin using any suggestions I gave you in my last post? Were they useful or were you too busy doing 10 things at once?

I noticed something recently myself and I want to share my experience – I had a problem with my internet provider setup so Tech Support helped me get everything fixed. The provider has up graded their site and when I got everything fixed I looked at my new sign in page. I could hardly tell where to sign in as there were so many ads, options and toolbars I was getting blinded by all the flashing, scrolling, multiple options on one screen.

I searched my new screen to write some emails but the email function was certainly secondary (or more correctly probably #9 out of 10) to all the ads and options I had available. How many of these options do I actually use? Almost 70% of them are unnecessary clutter and I can’t turn most of them off. The snarly guy sneering at me to re-finance, and the flashing diet miracle make me squeeze my email message between them to write. While trying to write they are like a circus flashing at me enticing me to ‘CLICK HERE”. And we wonder why we can’t focus? Duh!

It takes effort to stay focused these days! And the benefits of being mindful of what we are doing at the present moment are HUGE!

Here’s some easy examples – there are so many more:

1. You actually appreciate the food you are eating, the book you are reading, the relaxing bath you are taking

2. Your can calm & clear your mind to think in depth about a situation that requires your attention – and find the right solution.

3. You can finish projects you started last month, week, year

4. You can relax and really listen to your children, spouse, partner, friend

5. You can pay attention to (or discover) what’s really important in your life…

Can you clear out some of the clutter in your life and be mindful today? Let me know how you’re doing…..

FOCUS? Are you kidding? I have too much to do!

“I have so much to do…I can’t stay focused and get everything done”.  I hear my clients — and myself —say this WAY too often. It’s time to find a solution. How can we possibly concentrate on one thing until the task is complete then move on to the next job — this could take hours! Being focused also means paying attention and really listening when someone is speaking — and not thinking about three other things I think I ‘need’ to do NEXT.

It’s time to shift our energy and strengthen our ability to FOCUS.

The state of our home affects your mood, success, energy…in short, our life. Adjusting the flow of CHI (energy) in our home is the practice and goal of Feng Shui. Think of CHI as a breeze coming in the front door and slowly wafting and circulating through all the rooms bringing you life saving breath. Ideally, CHI flows smoothly, evenly, throughout all areas. As we de-cluttering and move furniture, we adjust the flow of CHI energy, and we are also changing our personal energy and state of mind. The ultimate purpose in fine-tuning the CHI in our home or office is to help us aCHIeve our personal goals for a happy, successful, abundant and balanced life.

The movement of CHI is what is important. Rushing and stagnating CHI create distractions and lack of focus.  Stagnating or blocked CHI (as with clutter) may keep us from aCHIeving all we want in life. Rushing CHI moves too fast and may cause too many opportunities to come at once or dash past us so fast that we miss them.

Think of rushing CHI as all the obligations talking to us at once…from our iPod to our broken dishwasher to our CHIld’s hockey game — all wanting attention — NOW! Stagnating CHI, as in clutter, causes confusion and feelings of helplessness. We cannot think clearly, much less concentrate. What can we do to get it all done and not feel guilty?

When we change aspects of our home, like re-arranging furniture, clearing clutter and changing colors, we are changing the CHI and shifting our personal energy at the same time.

Four Simple CHI-Changes to help increase our ability to FOCUS:

1. Clear clutter first — one room, one corner at a time.

• Clutter is distracting – and scatters your thinking taking your focus away from your task
• Clutter is blocking good energy from reaCHIng you – with good ideas for instance and new opportunities
• Clutter drains your energy
• Clutter negatively affects your mood

2. Create a functional, welcoming space to work — especially if you have a home office. It is more challenging to concentrate if you are constantly checking out the tv, moving the laundry to get to your books etc. Try these modifications:

• Light! This seems simple, but often offices have very inadequate lighting. Use daylight bulbs, as they are the least stressful and closest to natural light. Open blinds to add natural light-it is positively energizing.
• Desk placement – be sure you can see the door or entrance to your space easily from your seat. Do not face the wall if possible, or add a mirror so you can see someone coming into your office from behind your chair.
• Color – color affects us, often subtly. If a room is a gloomy color, or needs painting, it will affect how you feel. Re-paint – it’s an inexpensive energy boost. Choose color(s) you love…experiment with something different. Check out on line sites at Benjamin Moore new life and growth.

3. Meditate – and learn what is important to YOU. No need to sign up for special classes. Just find a quiet space, sit with your eyes closed, breathe deeply for 15 minutes each day to clear your mind of everything. It may not be easy to do in our busy lives, but it has HUGE calming benefits for your mental & physical health. In addition, when you are calm maintaining focus becomes easier.

4. Know Yourself – knowing your personality, likes & dislikes, what you do well and not so well and what excites you and gives you strength is how you learn to prioritize your time. Women often find themselves doing so much and often do not remember why they said “sure I’ll help out…sure I’d love to be on this committee.” In part, women get overwhelmed because they find it hard to say no.  Man or woman, make a list of your obligations and weekly to-do’s and read it aloud. You will be amazed at what you have to/want to accomplish each week.  Now re-write your list in order of personal importance-prioritize. Decide to delegate some obligations to others and delete other items all together.  Follow your new list for a week and see how much better you are able to keep on track.

This short blog can only begin to describe the importance of learning how to focus and complete the short & long-term goals in our lives. Taking time to master this talent develops self-respect and results in aCHIeving what is important in YOUR life.

Allow this information move slowly & steadily through your thinking like positive CHI wafting through your home. Don’t let it get stuck among the clutter in your in-box or rush past you out the window. Take time to try out the suggestions that suit you.  I’ll have more ideas next week. Get started, stay with it, check in, and let me know how you are doing. Remember, you are worth it!

Managing your desk clutter =  managing your time

I have lots of paper in my office. I haven’t learned to read everything on line so I print articles to read later. I make notes on post its and I collect articles in print to save. There’s just so many interesting things going on in the world, I don’t want to miss a thing. Does this sound familiar?

Well, I got fed up this week and decided to convert my desk from a “mess” desk to a “success” desk. This meant dealing with the last vestiges of clutter in my life…my papers. It has taken several attempts to clean everything up, but I am happy to report….I won! I created files for my articles, completed the tasks on my my old post it notes, created a ‘read later’ file on line, and finally my desk is my own to arrange as I like. Of course, I am following some special Feng Shui ideas to give me added power, insight, and effectiveness.

The adjustments I used on my desktop are based on the Bagua Map used in Feng Shui. It is the guide to all energy movement in life. I’ll tell you more about the Bagua Map in the future…but for now…just have a little trust. The Bagua square or rectangle is divided into 9 equal areas, three across and three down. The color for each area is shown below. Draw one for yourself, and place the grid parallel with your seat facing your desk. For most desks the career area will be closest to your chair. Use this as your guide to arrange your desktop.

It should look something like this:

Desk Chair will be to this side

Desktop Arrangement

We’ll start along the back row on the far left…

• Abundance & Wealth: place something expensive, gold, or a small fountain
• Fame & Reputation: to brighten your fame, place your business cards in the center back of your desk or a red candle (it works even if you don’t light it)
• Relationships: place a picture of yourself with your partner, an uplifting quote, flowers or names of current business contacts
• Health & Family: In the middle left choose between a photo of your family or a healthy plant.
• Wisdom: And just in front of Health on the left, keep a reference book, or anything that reminds you of wisdom to help in making good decisions.
• Career: Across the front in the center is Career…and the actual center of your desk (just behind Career) are for your computer when in use and writing an organizing projects.
• Helpful People: To the far right in front keep your phone, blackberry, iPod your communication too to reach all the helpful people in your life
• Creativity: on the right in the middle is the creativity area, a good place for current project files.

I hope this has inspired you to take a second look at your desk and make some helpful changes. Understand that you do not have to implement all of these cures. Personally, I like a more open, cleaner desk (even though as I said it has taken me while to get this done)…it feels expansive, lighter, more inspiring and I look forward to sitting down and getting to work.

Try something new, experience the SHIFT and do what feels right for you. That’s good Feng Shui.

February a Month of Love

Life is about our relationships with family, friends, children, co-workers, bosses, employees, doctors, teachers, mentors, lovers, neighbors…the list goes on.

Everyone longs for a special someone to share life’s most intimate and memorable moments. When we think about the ’special’ someone, we are either looking for them or trying to keep the spark alive with the person we share our love.

Here are our two situations:

• How to find the right “someone” for a long, loving and rewarding relationship?
• How to enhance our current love relationship and keep it strong and growing?

In each relationship there are similar truths to understand:

• Communicating openly and honestly develops strong relationships in all areas of life…especially love.
• We are most successful connecting with the right person when we know what is important to us.
• We are happiest and most successful when we know and love ourselves.

It’s important to remember that our thoughts and beliefs create our life’s reality. So check in with your thoughts several times daily and be sure you are maintaining a positive focus on life and your love goal. And it’s so very important to remember that showing the love we have in our heart for ourselves and others is very contagious and will attract other positive people to you.

Try these Feng Shui ‘cures’ and adjustments to help you.

New partner attraction tips:

• Make room for someone else in your home. Is there an extra chair at the table, room in the closet?
• Have a nightstand on each side of the bed…preferably equal in size for balance in relationship.
• Make your bedroom a romantic hideaway. No TV, no computer. Add romantic artwork, soft lights and fresh flowers or plants that symbolize new life & growth.
• Think in two’s – have two candles, two champagne glasses, pair of lovebirds.
• Plan fun events you will be attending with your new partner…make a list and go to some with a friend. Enthusiasm is catching…who knows who you will meet.
• Keep your front door area clean and inviting…you’re inviting in new people, opportunities, and relationships.
• Hang a crystal in the center of your bedroom to balance the energy flow.
• Write out your intentions for a loving relationship…such as ” I am so happy I am attracting a loving, fascinating, supportive person into my life”.

Enhancing current love relationships:

• Make your bedroom a romantic hideaway. Remove the TV, exercise machine and computer. Your bedroom is for sleep and romance.
• Remove all photos of family from the bedroom and add happy photos of you and your partner.
• Add inspiring, romantic artwork, soft lights and fresh flowers or plants that symbolize new life & growth.
• Have a nightstand on each side of the bed…preferably equal in size for balance in relationship.
• Clear all clutter from the bedroom.
• Think in two’s when decorating around your house – two candles, two champagne glasses, pair of lovebirds.
• Plan fun events with your partner…make a list and a date night with your mate.
• Hang a crystal in the center of your bedroom to balance the energy flow.
• Write positive intentions for your loving relationship…such as “I am so happy in a loving relationship with a fascinating, supportive person in my life”.

Have fun making these changes and remember to stay positively loving.